Tingle Dingle and The Land of Boredooom! Chapter 4

Hello everyone,  Well here is the 4th Chapter of Tingle Dingle and The Land of Boredoom! Who would have thought that boredom could be inspiring…

 

CHAPTER 4

THE LAND OF BOREDOOOM WITH A SENSE OF GLOOM

With a loud hammering on the door, Auntie Joanna burst into another rhyme:

‘With a knock and a bang into Boredoooom we plan… to visit a place which is a boring disgrace…

It’s time for us all to learn… that boredom should not be a concern…

Instead it can bring so much fun…. because beautiful ideas can come…

In fantasy and dreams… In Boredooom it seems…

That creativity can be… experienced for all to see…

Now open the door… That has been closed before…

To reveal that land that is so terribly bland…

Boredooooooooooooooooooom!!!!’ Auntie Joanna chanted.

The group gazed at Auntie Joanna with expressions of bemusement when nothing happened.

‘Erm…’ said Dianne. ‘Do you think you got it right?’

There was an awkward silence.  Auntie Joanna shrugged. Maybe there was no one listening. ‘Tingle and Josh, if anyone comes to the door then you have to appear bored. You can’t be all excitable or playful because these Boredooomians do not like excitement or laughter. They are completely different to the giants who like to hear giggling. These Boredooomians quite literally keel over when they get overexcited. They just can’t handle fun, laughter or general excitement. Do you understand?’

It seemed that Auntie Joanna was serious. Tingle sighed and nodded. What kind of place was Boredooom where the people did not laugh or have fun? What made it worse was that she didn’t like to appear bored or be bored, so anything boring was going to be a challenge. Tingle glanced at Josh who appeared sad. He didn’t like looking or appearing bored either. It just wasn’t fun. Although, if they had to do it then they would do their best. Surely it would be worth it.

‘Oh and no running around or screaming. You could wake a Grumpy. So any waving or big movements you must get them out of your systems now.’ Auntie Joanna was definite. The group had to clear out any fun or excitement from their systems. ‘I am going to get mine out of my system.’ She then launched into a series of star jumps and some really strange dance moves. ‘Come on Dianne and John!’ The pair reluctantly jumped up and down and shook themselves until they were relaxed.

‘Now put on your best bored faces,’ said Auntie Joanna.

John did his best and Dianne began to giggle. ‘You look like you just sniffed a bad smell!’ she said.

‘Dianne!’ cried Auntie Joanna. ‘No fun, no laughter and definitely no giggling. Compose yourself. Even if John looks like he has sniffed rotten sprouts you must appear bored. Remember the Grumpies!’

Dianne sighed and focused on looking bored. ‘Right I have got my best bored look.’ She turned to Tingle and Josh who watched their parents in amazement.

‘Right this is your last chance to get any excitement out,’ said Auntie Joanna to the brother and sister. ‘I will then say the rhyme again and hopefully it will work this time.’

Josh waved his dinosaur which hit the wall. A loud and very dull boom that sounded like a huge bell rumbled from the top of a clock tower. There was nothing exciting about the sound just a dull boom which resembled someone stepping on a depressed whoopee cushion. Josh froze and everyone glanced at him.

‘Well there we are… We could have simply rung the bell,’ said John doing his best to maintain a bored expression. He fluffed Josh’s hair in approval.

‘Well done Josh,’ said Auntie Joanna, with a huge grin which she quickly concealed to return to her best bored face.

‘Just on my boring way!’ said a completely unenthusiastic voice.  ‘Boring, boring, boring,’ the person on the other side of the door muttered in a tone so dull. ‘Boring… just so boring… and dullllllllllllllll and bland… Sooooo, sooooo bland and dreary and…. Grey,’ the group heard the monotonous voice repeat.

 A moment later a whole load of bolts sounded as the person on the other side of the door undid the latch and peered through. A grey eye, with grey, sallow skin peered through a number of chained latches. ‘Hello. What do you want?’ he asked in the most uninterested tone.

Auntie Joanna stepped forwards, ‘We came to visit Boredooom.’

‘Why would you do such a boring thing?’ he replied in a completely distant tone.

‘To explore absolute Boredooom,’ she replied attempting to sound completely unenthusiastic.

The groggy grey face behind the door appeared to frown, but very slowly. ‘Oh how very dull… You want to experience bland grey dullness and intense gloom? Why on earth would you want to do that?’

Dianne gestured to Tingle and Josh, ‘The children here said they were bored. We just wanted to show them Boredooooom to give them a bit of an insight into the different levels of boredom so that they have comparison.’

The grey-eyed saggy-featured man studied Josh and Tingle. ‘Is that true?’ he asked with a loud deflated huff.

Josh and Tingle bunched together. ‘Erm yes. It was raining, it is winter and Sunday. We were bored. We tried playing everything but boredom got us…’ Tingle replied in a small voice.

Josh raised his dinosaur. ‘Bored, bored, borrrreeeed!’ ‘Rooooooaar!’ he said as he waved his dinosaur.

The grey man flinched and a look of horror graced his face. He appeared as though he had stepped on a wasp. ‘Oh please stop that… It is just too much excitement for me.’ The gawky grey man behind the door appeared thoughtful. ‘Okay but I warn you… This place is like nothing you have ever seen. Now you have to remain completely bored for the duration of your visit and there is to be no fun whatsoever you hear? Oh and laughter is simply not allowed because you will wake the Grumpies and you never want to wake up a Grumpy. They will just bring you down!’

Tingle and Josh glanced at their Auntie who concealed a smirk. She could never be boring so how was she going to manage? Auntie Joanna nodded towards Josh and Tingle, as if asking them to say yes.

‘Yes sir,’ said Tingle who made sure she appeared very bored. ‘I won’t even smile,’ she replied seriously.

Josh did his best really bored expression and put his dinosaur to sleep. ‘Yes sir…’ he said in a bored tone and yawned.

Auntie Joanna glanced at John and Dianne, she was clearly impressed by how bored two children could look when they were asked to do so.

‘Well I suppose I should let you in, but you only have a few hours because otherwise you might get used to The Land of Boredooom and want to stay…’ With that he released all the chains and slowly opened the door. ‘Are you ready?’ he said with a yawn and a loud dragged out sigh.

‘Yes we’re ready,’ Tingle fought her excitement and did her best to seem really uninterested.

Josh yawned and nodded in the most bored way he could. When the door opened both of them shook their heads at the sight before them. They couldn’t believe that such a place existed.

Link To Tingle Dingle and The Land of Boredooom! on Amazon.co.uk

TingleDingle Boredoom V2

 

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