That Refund You Owe Me – The Italian Salami

Hello Elizabeth Hotel,
I notice you still haven’t paid me the refund you promised me. So I feel it is time to introduce the big guns in the form of an Italian Salami. You see I like the fact that Italian Salamis resemble giant phallis. That in itself could be entertaining… And talking of knobs… I bet you have some rather interesting door handles at your hotel. You probably have an excellent management structure who must really enjoy focusing on ornamental knobs around the hotel.
Talking about your management – they must be enjoying these little beauties. Imagine already a few thousand people have learned about the lack of promised refund, the misleading and the lack of response. What makes it more amazing is that the number of followers is growing daily. What makes it all the more amusing is my friends know that I am relentless when I decide on a cause… So they are loving watching my escapades.
Anyway I deviated from Suprise Salami Story… That might be a good expression for when you accidentally wonder into a hotel room and discover a suspicious salami soaking scene. You can imagine how a salami can be mistakenly soaked… it happens in hotels all the time… Especially hotels with water beds. Surfing sausagey salami stallions… could be quite an image.
Talking of Salami smuggling… A woman was arrested for smuggling a salami through the airport. She hid a salami in her underwear… Why anyone would do that is beyond me. Apparently there was quite a protrusion which is what caught the attention… When she was questioned she said she missed her boyfriend. Of course that got me thinking. Was her boyfriend a Salami? Did her boyfriend have his own natural salami? If someone keeps a salami in their underwear –  is that a smuggled salami or a pet salami. Surely there has to be a salami delivery point to smuggle something…
Well it seems this is just the beginning of Itàlian Salami thoughts… and guess who is going to receive them all until I receive my refund… That refund you promised me… Oooh I really have some odd thoughts brewing… I can’t wait to share them… There are so many… Like a massive storm. YIPEEEEE!
The Link to Cruise Ship Creatures on Audio

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