THE MONSTERS’ DANCE – FIRST 3 CHAPTERS

Jenny and Ben accidentally receive an invitation to the Monsters’ Dance. Do monsters really exist? If so, don’t they eat children?The Monsters’ Dance is a celebration like no other – it is a time of great monster festivity because it takes place on the longest day, meaning the nights will soon draw in and true monstering can take place. When the brother and sister accidentally receive the invitation to the monsters’ dance they think it is a joke but what if it isn’t? Surely they have to go and find out… The only thing stopping them is the big question: what if monsters eat children? The pair are torn between curiosity and fear. Maybe they just need to come up with a brilliant disguise. That way they can find out once and for all: how do monsters dance? … More THE MONSTERS’ DANCE – FIRST 3 CHAPTERS

Will Yucky, The Slime Monster Win The Monsters’ Dance?

Everyone in the Yuck Clan could armpit slime a moving target at one hundred meters if necessary. If he was ever in danger then he would lift an arm and a jet of slime would cover his assailant. Yucky was designed purely for repulsive monsterdooom. … More Will Yucky, The Slime Monster Win The Monsters’ Dance?

Could Clonk, The Clumsy Monster Win The Monsters’ Dance?

Of course it would be astonishing and the challenge was not to kick anyone or anything of importance when he took to the floor. To make it increasingly tough, he would have to be courageous and overcome his fear of being seen. Being clumsy often drew the wrong kind of attention. So he had developed skills where he was brilliant at being a chameleon and blending in, yet such a contest meant that he would have to face being the centre of attention as the spotlight would be on him. … More Could Clonk, The Clumsy Monster Win The Monsters’ Dance?

LOVE HUNT – THE LOVE GAME 8

Rubbish! In the meantime, the office pervert has developed his drooling technique and the office bore has moved desks. I will have to time my toilet visits to avoid monotonous stories about beavers or badgers. My worst moment was when he accosted me by the drinks machine and detailed the mating cycle of the Salmon. It was hideous, people in the area were shaking with laughter as I attempted to make every excuse to escape… … More LOVE HUNT – THE LOVE GAME 8

THE LOVE HUNT II – THE LOVE GAME – 4

Other than that, those who get where I am coming from please share all these dating disasters with your friends, family and pets. It may well please and entertain them during dark winter’s evenings. God knows I sit at my desk writing this stuff with tears streaming down my face… Before we go any further I would like to admit I laugh at my own jokes and that is why I write these books. It is like literary mental orgasms where I simply lose control and fall about laughing while writing. I don’t do that during the ‘act’ actually maybe I do… I have done this in public too – not orgasm… Oh God… I mean laugh at my own jokes in public. Right I think we should get on… … More THE LOVE HUNT II – THE LOVE GAME – 4